Jean did the mindful spending exercise I wrote about in Mindfulness and Money, Part 2. She had this experience a few days later:
“I realized I was driving behind a Mercedes when the driver stopped for no apparent reason. I began judging: rich, entitled people. Bad.
When we both got to the stoplight, I noticed there were three women in it. Rich, snotty people. Arrogant. They think they’re better than you. Those bitches. From the suburbs northeast of here. They don’t need cars like that. Nobody needs to spend that kind of money on a car.
Next I noticed I was judging, so began to just look at the car. I thought, good quality. I asked myself if I’d like one, a pertinent question as I’m in the process of buying a new car.
I then became aware of feeling very uncomfortable. Status symbol, status symbols are bad, ostentatious display of wealth, wealth is bad, is wealth bad? “
When we want to find the roots of our “ancient, twisted karma,” there is such benefit to first seeing what is in our internal landscapes before doggedly making ourselves spend less. Jean was surprised to discover these thoughts and feelings within herself, as she’ been working on her “poverty mentality” for quite some time. Maybe there are times she should spend more money than she initially feels comfortable with. But she won’t know that, either, until she learns more about her poverty consciousness, the beliefs that maintain it, and whether or not she wants to continue holding these beliefs.
“In the meantime, though, I still need a new car,” she said. “My raggedly ’97 Chevy has the paint wearing off on the roof, and I’m embarrassed for my co-workers to see it. Talk about the embodiment of poverty consciousness!
“There’s no need for me to get this all figured out first. The point is, I’m working on it.”
I’ve just read this post of mindfulness and money. I know all about that poverty mentality and I’m also working on clearing it. It definitely is about conscious effort, which can be hard, but the turnaround in your attitude, then your fortune will be worth it.
Thanks, Pienbiscuits, for your thoughts. If you’d be interested in talking about how you’re working on this issue, please do. These conversations generate such good ideas and insights.
Two stimulating discussions yesterday about financing later-in-life care led me to three new decisions. First, maintain awareness of how I’ve been avoiding this question, and investigating this. Second, I’m pulling out my investment records to do some figuring and thinking. Third, I’m going back to a great book I want to recommend to all of you about preparing for the end of life: The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying, by Sogyal Rinpoche.